Nine Things Successful People Do Differently
Nine Things Successful People Do Differently
Why have you been so successful in reaching some of your goals, but not others? If you aren't sure, you are far from alone in your confusion. It turns out that even brilliant, highly accomplished people are pretty lousy when it comes to understanding why they succeed or fail. The intuitive answer — that you are born predisposed to certain talents and lacking in others — is really just one small piece of the puzzle. In fact, decades of research on achievement suggests that successful people reach their goals not simply because of who they are, but more often because of what they do.
1. Get specific. When you set yourself a goal, try to be as specific as possible. "Lose 5 pounds" is a better goal than "lose some weight," because it gives you a clear idea of what success looks like. Knowing exactly what you want to achieve keeps you motivated until you get there. Also, think about the specific actions that need to be taken to reach your goal. Just promising you'll "eat less" or "sleep more" is too vague — be clear and precise. "I'll be in bed by 10pm on weeknights" leaves no room for doubt about what you need to do, and whether or not you've actually done it.
2. Seize the moment to act on your goals. Given how busy most of us are, and how many goals we are juggling at once, it's not surprising that we routinely miss opportunities to act on a goal because we simply fail to notice them. Did you really have no time to work out today? No chance at any point to return that phone call? Achieving your goal means grabbing hold of these opportunities before they slip through your fingers.
To seize the moment, decide when and where you will take each action you want to take, in advance. Again, be as specific as possible (e.g., "If it's Monday, Wednesday, or Friday, I'll work out for 30 minutes before work.") Studies show that this kind of planning will help your brain to detect and seize the opportunity when it arises, increasing your chances of success by roughly 300%.
3. Know exactly how far you have left to go. Achieving any goal also requires honest and regular monitoring of your progress — if not by others, then by you yourself. If you don't know how well you are doing, you can't adjust your behavior or your strategies accordingly. Check your progress frequently — weekly, or even daily, depending on the goal.
4. Be a realistic optimist. When you are setting a goal, by all means engage in lots of positive thinking about how likely you are to achieve it. Believing in your ability to succeed is enormously helpful for creating and sustaining your motivation. But whatever you do, don't underestimate how difficult it will be to reach your goal. Most goals worth achieving require time, planning, effort, and persistence. Studies show that thinking things will come to you easily and effortlessly leaves you ill-prepared for the journey ahead, and significantly increases the odds of failure.
5. Focus on getting better, rather than being good. Believing you have the ability to reach your goals is important, but so is believing you can get the ability. Many of us believe that our intelligence, our personality, and our physical aptitudes are fixed — that no matter what we do, we won't improve. As a result, we focus on goals that are all about proving ourselves, rather than developing and acquiring new skills.
Fortunately, decades of research suggest that the belief in fixed ability is completely wrong — abilities of all kinds are profoundly malleable. Embracing the fact that you can change will allow you to make better choices, and reach your fullest potential. People whose goals are about getting better, rather than being good, take difficulty in stride, and appreciate the journey as much as the destination.
6. Have grit. Grit is a willingness to commit to long-term goals, and to persist in the face of difficulty. Studies show that gritty people obtain more education in their lifetime, and earn higher college GPAs. Grit predicts which cadets will stick out their first grueling year at West Point. In fact, grit even predicts which round contestants will make it to at the Scripps National Spelling Bee.
The good news is, if you aren't particularly gritty now, there is something you can do about it. People who lack grit more often than not believe that they just don't have the innate abilities successful people have. If that describes your own thinking .... well, there's no way to put this nicely: you are wrong. As I mentioned earlier, effort, planning, persistence, and good strategies are what it really takes to succeed. Embracing this knowledge will not only help you see yourself and your goals more accurately, but also do wonders for your grit.
7. Build your willpower muscle. Your self-control "muscle" is just like the other muscles in your body — when it doesn't get much exercise, it becomes weaker over time. But when you give it regular workouts by putting it to good use, it will grow stronger and stronger, and better able to help you successfully reach your goals.
To build willpower, take on a challenge that requires you to do something you'd honestly rather not do. Give up high-fat snacks, do 100 sit-ups a day, stand up straight when you catch yourself slouching, try to learn a new skill. When you find yourself wanting to give in, give up, or just not bother — don't. Start with just one activity, and make a plan for how you will deal with troubles when they occur ("If I have a craving for a snack, I will eat one piece of fresh or three pieces of dried fruit.") It will be hard in the beginning, but it will get easier, and that's the whole point. As your strength grows, you can take on more challenges and step-up your self-control workout.
8. Don't tempt fate. No matter how strong your willpower muscle becomes, it's important to always respect the fact that it is limited, and if you overtax it you will temporarily run out of steam. Don't try to take on two challenging tasks at once, if you can help it (like quitting smoking and dieting at the same time). And don't put yourself in harm's way — many people are overly-confident in their ability to resist temptation, and as a result they put themselves in situations where temptations abound. Successful people know not to make reaching a goal harder than it already is.
9. Focus on what you will do, not what you won't do. Do you want to successfully lose weight, quit smoking, or put a lid on your bad temper? Then plan how you will replace bad habits with good ones, rather than focusing only on the bad habits themselves. Research on thought suppression (e.g., "Don't think about white bears!") has shown that trying to avoid a thought makes it even more active in your mind. The same holds true when it comes to behavior — by trying not to engage in a bad habit, our habits get strengthened rather than broken.
If you want change your ways, ask yourself, What will I do instead? For example, if you are trying to gain control of your temper and stop flying off the handle, you might make a plan like "If I am starting to feel angry, then I will take three deep breaths to calm down." By using deep breathing as a replacement for giving in to your anger, your bad habit will get worn away over time until it disappears completely.
It is my hope that, after reading about the nine things successful people do differently, you have gained some insight into all the things you have been doing right all along. Even more important, I hope are able to identify the mistakes that have derailed you, and use that knowledge to your advantage from now on. Remember, you don't need to become a different person to become a more successful one. It's never what you are, but what you do.
Heidi Grant Halvorson, Ph.D. is a motivational psychologist, and author of the new book Succeed: How We Can Reach Our Goals (Hudson Street Press, 2011). She is also an expert blogger on motivation and leadership for Fast Company and Psychology Today. Her personal blog, The Science of Success, can be found at www.heidigranthalvorson.com. Follow her on Twitter @hghalvorson
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Friday, June 24, 2011
4th – 6th May 2011
How is it after reading my first part of my Hong Kong trip? Well, now I would like to share my stories of the second journey, the neighborhood not to be missed – Macau. I heard the story of Macau is how the Portugese landed in the city and ask a grandma, what is the name of this place, and the old grandma replied: “Macau” and hence, Macau was born.
Macau is a fantasy wonderful world for people who want to get easy fast money, to get the thrill and excitement of winning big, but will also make your life upside down when you lose money. When you win money, chicks with super sexy body will be seen wandering around to ask you to spend the night with them.
In terms of the places, Macau is quieter than Hong Kong, where more people are spending their time in the casino more than walking outside at the streets. The city view seems nicer at night, with magical fountain and totally amazing decoration of casinos you can ever see. We thought of heading to the panda zoo, but due to lack of time, wish to hug a panda once I saw them, but we have no time.
Hence, please grab your music, sit back, chill and relax while reading my blog. More info at:-
4th May 2011
Place landed: Hong Kong Garden and Shopping Centre
The usual big tall unique building structure, but this time you will see the little garden being clinched together along with a restaurant and two waterfalls, you can also take a ride of your eyes to explore the whole big garden
It was quite a long journey ride taking a bus from Fen Ling to here. With all the big bags we are taking, we are quite tired. Many working people rather pack their food and enjoy eating their food in the garden, cannot blame them though, the restaurant is kind of small for people to eat comfortably I supposed.
The video of pictures :- 1 / 2 :- Macau
Time: 4 – 5 pm
Place landed: Macau! Macau!
What’s special? With sticking our buttocks to the ferry from Hong Kong (bye, Hong Kong L ), we finally reach Macau within an hour. What amazed me, is, of course each unique of one kind of each casino, it has their own design and different amusement places around.
We go for Casino Lisboa Hotel this time and oh my god, bath tub! I am one of the kinds who crazy for bath tub, can stay in the toilet for hours.
|hey, who stole and displayed my Ferrari without my permission?|
|Rapunzel at the top, while the prince standing watching her XD|
|oh my god, help help!|
Time: 7 pm – 12am
Place landed: walking around Macau Street
The special water foundation done by the Wynn hotel, seeing how the water ‘dance’ with the music and pamper us with colorful colors of lights made us looking at the performance from the beginning till the end.
The city is quiet, so does the park. You can enjoy the cold wind, with your lovely breeze walk in the evening time.
I would say the casino I love the most is MGM Casino, I like how they make a mini park with some nice restaurants in the park, not the gambling point of view.
5th May 2011 – Tralalalalallalalalaa….wake up wake up and off we go and hit the road again!
Video 1 / 2 :- Macau
|fresh custard milk, smooth and delicious|
|pls, don't miss this|
Time: 10am – 4pm
Place landed: Macau Street
Please, if you not here to enjoy food, what for you come all the way here? So , hearing everyone say please don’t miss the custard milk and egg tarts, of course we are not missing them! As I don’t eat meat, my others friends grab the pork burgers at here.
Landed their historical place, Ruins of St. Paul’s, the first western-style university in the Far East. It was quit e a view and something different at least. Many tourists came here to snap pictures.
First time went into a church, feel so peaceful at there.
Wonder at here, it is famous for historical or shopping? Many people come here to buy souvenirs, shopping, and biscuits.
Pass by this cute durian stall. I smiled when I saw the word, seems durian has being translated to ‘gold pillow’.
We went into one of their famous church, the St. Anthony’s Catholic Church; taking some pictures and suddenly an auntie came to shouted and scolded us for taking the pictures, and related the radioactive of our camera with the incident of Japan. Will the radioactive can be coming to Macau from Japan?
|our four girls' made this cute mickey mouse look alike from disneyland, cool huh?|
Time: 6 – 9.30pm
Place landed: Macau Tower
The tallest bungee jump tower in the world, so thrilled seeing people just jump down with a price of RM 2000++, worth it? I would say it depends on individual, if you ask me, I think it is worth it, I mean is like you will feel the excitement when you yourself personally experienced it!
Went to their tower to enjoy food, and boy….that was quite a lot of food, amazingly, they do not only serve their local food, and they do also serve nice food from other countries.
You got to laugh at this. We saw an aunty took few apples and oranges and slipped those big ones into her big bag, and she turned her head around to make sure no one notice she is taking the fruits. Oh my, why doesn’t she take something even more worth it? Maybe should call her bring a tupperware and smuggle all the oysters into the tupperware instead.
Time: 10pm – 12am
Place landed: Venice Hotel
Took the free bus to rush to Venice hotel just for a view. The thing I like most is the little man-made river with such a bright blue color makes the place look refreshing, and this make me feel like going Italy real soon.
Running here and there due to lack of time. Did not explore the other casinos as the last call for the bus is 12am.
6th May 2011 – our last day, awwww…but it is okay, we took bus outside of our hotel and went for a walk before going back Malaysia.
|Macau chinese pancake as breakfast|
|the famous chinese dumplings|
|the restaurant, tips: go for the food, but not the drinks|
|i love this...this is awesome!|
|capture this using my normal phone, but i love it|
|my hotel :)|
Time: 11am – 1pm
Place landed: http://www.fishermanswharf.com.mo/eng/
What’s special? I like all the ancient Roman and dynasty buildings; it makes me feel I am at their country.
Saw some kids having some model’s catwalk, they are awesome in posing.
Super hot, and hot, and hot.
With out of nowhere, comes one horror amusement park aka volcano? Hmmm, not so interested though.
Rating: 4/5 (because of the buildings)
The end of everything? No, it is just the beginning, and the journey of my life should be even better and better. Thanks for watching, errr…..reading….